I talk to Bella every day about her day, what she did, what she enjoyed, what she felt about certain situations. It is always such a fascinating look inside her world, into her perspectives and values. Talking openly with our children about the seemingly mundane can lead to some big conversations, those ones where you suddenly realise you are in the midst of a teaching moment, and you better do it justice. And so it was with my after-school chat with my girl the other day… Read More
Two weeks ago, Bella and I took a little break and drove down to our flat in Umhlanga. While I have done this same journey with her a few times, I think that this was the first year that a road-trip actually made sense to her. And it was definitely interesting… Read More
I am raising a daughter. And I am scared. Terrified. I am scared of sending her out into a world where I cannot protect her. I am scared that no matter what I teach her at home, what others may say to or about her may cut away at her self confidence until one day she believes them. I am scared she will be labelled “fat”, “bitch”, “nerd”, “whore”; any label that is said to define her, to make her feel confined by what others may think of her. I am scared that she may have the voice to stand up for herself, but that others won’t listen. I am scared that she will be ridiculed or teased. I am scared of her being hurt, being taken advantage of, being violated, being disrespected. I am scared that she won’t be taken as seriously because she is a girl. I am raising a daughter and I am scared. Read More
About a month ago I announced that I will be turning my little blog into a book, and I asked my friends, family and readers to send me stories. Honest, heart-felt stories, the truth behind what it is really like to be a Mama; so that together we can create a book written with Mamas, for Mamas. Read More
Yikes, it has been a while since my last blog post. I needed a time-out. I just didn’t know it then. Or know how long it would be. Or where it would lead. But here we are, almost a year and a whole bunch of changes later.
So in the last few months, a few things have happened. We moved into a new home (the most amazing little suburb complete with new friends, daily walks to the park and all that cute suburban community stuff that makes you get all warm and tingly on the inside). I also got a new car. And dyed my hair blonder. We got a puppy – the sweetest little girl Spaniel, named Sophia. I found my way back to my spirituality, saw a Shaman and dealt with some heavy truths that needed to be processed. I started teaching a new Grade and made some big changes in my personal life. Shoh, when I write it all down like that, A LOT is different. And I am totally high fiving myself right now!
And now I’m back to two syllables. The creative urge to write, coupled with some serious meditation on where I want this blog to go, has now led me here. To this moment. Read More
I would like to introduce you to your body. It is beautiful, sacred and strong. It is yours and yours alone. It houses your kind heart capable of making all those around you feel loved, your brain capable of challenging you and achieving all you set out to accomplish, and your soul capable of changing this world. Look after this body baby girl, it houses you. Read More
To my sweet baby girl,
I have been recording some of the things you have said since learning to talk, the amazing and wonderfully innocent voice of a child. Never be afraid of that voice my baby. Always have courage in your convictions, and be a voice, not an echo.
‘The most courageous act is still to think for yourself. Aloud’ – Coco Chanel
This world deserves to hear your voice.
Love you forever and always,
‘Something pink’. That was her answer when I asked her what she wanted to do for Valentine’s Day. Something pink?!
It was an odd request. Pink is not a place or an activity. How can you do a colour?! I could have just ignored it and taken her for brunch to celebrate. But I wanted to do what she had asked to do. I asked her more detailed questions about what exactly she wanted that was pink, and all I got was ‘pink please’. So I researched, I googled, I asked friends for ideas. What was pink in Johannesburg that I could do with my Valentine? Read More
I have a confession… I lied to you.
I’m sorry, but it just happened. And once it was out there, I didn’t know how to take it back. So I am writing this letter to explain myself.
Okay, so here goes…
When we move into a bigger house. When we move to Cape Town. When I’m next pregnant. When I get married. When ‘the two of us’ becomes ‘the three of us’ and hopefully ‘the four of us’. When I’m older. When she’s older. When when when!
I admit that I am guilty of having these thoughts. Of living in a future I know nothing about. A future that is not guaranteed for any of us. Maybe we will move to Cape Town, and maybe we won’t. Maybe I will get married and have more children, and maybe I won’t. But that is not what’s important; the possible future that lies ahead of us all is not what is important. I only recently made the realisation that I was doing this, and it hit me like a tonne of bricks, smack bang in the face, and made me question and reevaluate my mama self. Read More